What was done to him was like what happens on the train, when you think you are moving forward, but are moving backward, and suddenly find out the real direction.
"Yes, it was all not right," he said to himself, "but never mind. I can, I can do 'right.' But what is 'right'?" he asked himself and suddenly grew still.
--from The Death of Ivan Ilyich
Category Archives: “the Other”
People, lately
Sergei is here. He is the plumber, and he is fixing my leaky garbage disposal. When I speak to him, I am less sure of myself than usual. It is as if I cannot quite predict his own speech. This … Continue reading
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proof of my inconsistency
There is a big black spider in my bathroom. Seriously, Los Angeles is gross. Anyway, of course I couldn’t kill it, especially after my last experience when I accidentally tortured (its legs were coming off one by one) and killed … Continue reading
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truth and care
We learn that we cannot say things to people. When we were younger we had a fancy that we would seek and find relationships in which we could fully express ourselves. FULLY express ourselves. And then, experience after experience, and … Continue reading
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sex, christ, and the death of the idea
Passion is a funny thing. What is not physical cannot stand its fate: being caged up in a jail of lonely ideas. In one frenzied, impetuous last resort — when it realizes that no two humans can understand and share … Continue reading
Posted in "the Other", Philosophizings
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the virtues of normative social approximation
I am terrible at faking it. My being uncomfortable with faking it is probably both a cause and an effect of this ineptitude. This is the bane of my social existence. This might sound like “strength disguised as a weakness,” … Continue reading
Posted in "the Other", Self Contemplation
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